endless two days

I wanted to blog about a billion times this weekend. Needed to. I didn’t, partly because I was so crazy busy, partly because I would have just blogged about the same damn thing. There were several tears this weekend—I miss him as much as the day he left. Instead of writing, during the few free moments I had, I read. Read two books—it has been so long since I have taken the time to read. It was wonderful. Books (most of the time) are able to shut off my brain nearly as much as work does. Also really got me excited for summer to try to write again. Can’t wait. Even if I never get rich and famous from writing, I pray I can make enough so that I can teach and write, instead of teach and massage. In addition, the weekend was gorgeous. I spend hours (literally) outside, working in the yard, walking the dogs, walking with my nose in a book. Overall, actually, it was a strange weekend—so many highs (with three different friends at different times, my bff twice!, and with lots of food, and two different movies) and so many lows. Not sure how my psyche was able to fit it all in—including massages from 9-2:30 on Saturday. And to think in college I thought I’d work forty hour weeks and have ample cash! Wha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
To top it all off, my birthday is this weekend. Which I know doesn’t help my ever twisting emotional rollercoaster. As we all know, I hate my birthdays. Although this one can’t be as horrible as last year—nor as perfect as my 30th. I have a very, very low –key weekend planed, which actually should be pretty nice—if I can only turn off my brain long enough to not slip into recall mode. Having my gorgeous nephew around should help with that (thank you, nephew’s mom, for letting us have him for my birthday!).
One surreal highlight of the weekend: KE and I went to a gay bar, which I hate, but this one I was pretty sure he wouldn’t be at. It was a lot of fun, very bright and loungy feeling. The best part? At one point, the main song from Glee came on. The entire bar stopped. Stopped dead. Everyone. Everyone began to sing together. It was awesome. When it ended, everything went back to normal. I love movie moments.