Saturday, August 22, 2009

forcing life

As much as I overanalyze and try to see every possible outcome to most any situation, it always comes as a bit of a blow when something hits me out of the blue—especially when it should have been obvious.

I am leaving for my date in about ten minutes. I have been coming up with different dinner options that he can choose from. What I didn’t expect, but what I should have, was how today has brought back so many specific memories of several first months of Chad pursuing me and our beginning dates. Most of the time, I am bombarded with thoughts of the life we built together and over what I had dreamed and thought we had. However, planning a date has rushed all those wonderful memories back of when we started and how much he wanted me and how much he loved me (I guess he can attest to be careful what you wish for, you might get it). I am going to do my best to push him out of my mind tonight and simply enjoy being with someone who wanted to go out with me. How you push the man you saw as your husband out of your mind while you’re on a date, I’m not really sure. Guess I’ll try and find out.

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