Monday, February 22, 2010

turn about is fair play

My big discovery for the day didn’t even come from me. It was told to me at a dinner party last night: How to block certain updates on Facebook. I no longer have to hear about what people are doing to their zoos, their farms, their whatever. It has been very fun to go a little block crazy. I must say, however, the last thing I blocked did give me pause. Before you block something, it asks you if you are sure you want to blog such and such. Well, this last one asked: Are you sure you want to block: What God wants you to know…..

I hit yes.

I’m sure for all those who were one the fence about my damnation, the fires just got clarified for you.

Of course, if there was a real Facebook app that actually came from God, I’d not have clicked yes. Unless he kept telling me how he was altering his rollercoaster themepark to attract more visitors.

I do wish I could block certain theme’s of people’s posts. The ones about how drunk they got or how bored they are in their life or how many cheeseburgers they ate (oh, that’s one’s mine…) rather drive me crazy. However, the one that drives me the most insane are the ones about God. Not from people who occasionally put up something about their feelings about God (good and bad) or requests for prayer or thanking him for something, but there seems to be an endless supply of rote, asinine, cliché blabberings about God. And an assortment of various Bible verses spewed forth from the same people over and over and over and over again—the ones that are clearly not something that was on the person’s mind or heart, but are coming from a place of ‘witnessing’ via Facebook or preaching at others. I think, honestly, the part that gets me the most is the fact that the select people that do this seem to believe that this does some sort of good for God. As if their endless Bible and cliché abuse causes people to want to know God. The worst offender of this is an old college roommate (not from the Christian University) who used to go tear the posters off of other people’s dorm room doors (that’s a lot of O’s) with which he didn’t agreed (in the name of witnessing). Every post he puts up talks about reaching the lost, searching for sheep, exulting the most high. I can’t help but put myself in God’s shoes (I know, I know, I would never be so assumptuous). After a long day of hearing my name spouted by endless children and a Para for no particular reason, I swear I will kill the next person that says it. Luckily, no one outside of school calls me Mr. Witt. Except for my folks. Just kidding.

Likewise, I turn to my gay website (not a sex hookup site—really) and am accosted by the opposite. All these gays going on and on and on about every single straight man who stands up for us (Ewan McGregor, etc) obviously being gay and needing to come out. While I would be the first in line if he ever did, is there a faster way to alienate straight men from treating us as equals and standing beside us for our rights than to call him out for being a fag? Likewise, the exhaustive onslaught against those who stand against us the most—those that are homophobic and hostile to us… What is our argument against them? They must be closeted gays, of course. The whole ‘doth protest too much’ argument. Wonderful! I’m so glad the biggest assholes of the world are assholes because they are really just like me! Yay! Great argument guys. Way to see ourselves as an insult. You hate us? Hmmm, what’s the worst insult I can come up with… Let me think. . . Oh, right! You’re a big, cock-sucking queer!!! Now don’t you feel ashamed and dirty? Sick! Oh, wait a minute….

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